So, ended up in what Vernon Kay would call the local carpet club last night. I was only supposed to be at a friends then maybe to a local pub but ended up properly out. I was wearing black jeans, a silver lace top and some maroon ballet pumps - so a but casual but not too bad. My friends were wearing fairly similar, never the less when the boys persuaded us to go to this carpet club we did insist we were perhaps a little under dressed for a club.
When we got there however, I couldn't decide if we were over dressed or under dressed. Quickly we rushed to the toilets as I had my make up in my hand bag, and we proceeded to add some lipstick and bronzer. As we did there were some entertaining outfits on show. Picture a 6th form fashion run by the fashion unconscious group. These girls must have got dressed in the dark or taken their inspiration from both TOWIE, clowns and hobos. Combined these do not look pretty, but you knew that already!
The most amusing was probably a very tall, very tanned, very blonde girl. She looked like a human Barbie, or maybe Sindy (the cheap tacky one). Also she was wearing a corset top with her tits bubbling over the top circa 1999 and a tiny black skirt circa her vagina! To top it all off, probably so she didn't look too slutty, she had a large square silk scarf wrapped around her shoulders... This just looked so out of place. Like a mosh pit at the ballet. I don't see how she got from tits and tat out black outfit to thinking her nan's neckerchief would be an appropriate accompaniment!
Suffice to say I felt fine about my outfit after this. Particularly as the men were either part of the white shirt brigade or the check shirt brigade all with jeans. How very creative of them all!
Saturday, 7 January 2012
Monday, 5 September 2011
A quiet Monday night - in a time machine pub!
Have just spent the evening in a fairly quiet bar/pub. The kind of place that is friendly to students but pretty much most nights is quiet but opens up an underground dance floor and dj at the weekend.
As I was having a drink (on a first date!!) I suddenly realised I was actually cerca 1989-1994!! This of course meant I should have been way under the legal drinking age but that has never stopped me before. In walked a man as I was sipping on my rose wearing white jeans, black loafers and a black t-shirt. I mean.... really??
I wanted to say something but didn't want to appear rude to my date so instead I felt it appropriate to snigger instead (bad choice I know). I just couldn't believe it! He looked like he had mugged e17 on the way to a party or Bros. (the 80s duo) at a concert. Neither are looks one aspires to any more and for a good reason. Monochrome is generally elegant and 'safe' as a fashion choice but this was not. It's pretty much up there with the white linen trousers and black/patterned underwear combo. It just shouldn't be a mistake people make these days!!!
Sunday, 4 September 2011
Night Club Nightmares
As I frequented a local bar last night, (yes I am still suffering), I noticed a large number of bad outfits. I suggest people discontinue dressing like it is 1995 in lycra white backless dresses and scrunchies (my mortal enemy). It is after all 2011 and it is currently not even retro or vintage yet.
Although during my evening as my alcohol consumption rose due to bellinis and jagerbombs I nearly plucked up the courage to suggest to a girl she should read a magazine or watch gok wan. Luckily my need to remain without a black eye prevailed and I did not go over to her. Even though part of me thinks it would of done her some good!
Although during my evening as my alcohol consumption rose due to bellinis and jagerbombs I nearly plucked up the courage to suggest to a girl she should read a magazine or watch gok wan. Luckily my need to remain without a black eye prevailed and I did not go over to her. Even though part of me thinks it would of done her some good!
Sunday, 21 August 2011
Holiday Wardrobe
Having just arrived back from holiday in Zante I spent the week pondering peoples mad choice of outfits!! (Don't worry I did actually have fun too and didn't just do this!)
First of all - Bikinis!
Has there not been enough advice on TV programmes, in magazines, from your friends, even from your mother! Why do people with hugely flabby bellies insist on wearing tiny little bikinis? It looks awful when you are doing anything other than lying down flat and sucking your stomach in so you can;t actually breathe anymore. The worse I happened to see was a woman who must have been 35-40 and a size 12. She had quite a nice figure but clearly hadn't ever done a sit up in her life. She sat round the pool watching her children play and rested her arm on her belly. As in it was rolled up underneath her hiding her bikini bottoms and she had her arm on it squidging it further. Gross!
Denim shorts...
Now I like denim shorts, especially if you have the legs for them. What I am yet to understand is the need for, largely younger girls, to walk around with their shorts undone and bikini bottoms showing. Does anyone actually know the point of this as I think it looks pretty stupid? Maybe those who do it are not very bright and have forgotten how to work a zip. Especially with the sun making everyone's hair blonder and all those brightly coloured cocktails with masses of e numbers. I will assume this is whats happened.
White...
I like white for clothing. Nice linen trousers, long flowing maxi dresses, party dresses and my favourite are a nice pair of white shorts. I did see a lot of underwear on display though. I thought the lingerie business world had thought of all underwear solutions. Unfortunately it appears no one is actually buying them. I don't need to see french knickers of any colour being swallowed by someone's arse whilst I'm enjoying my lamb kleftiko or sipping the aforementioned brightly coloured cocktails. It is not appealing. I suggest checking at home how see through the item of white clothing is and deciding a - is it too see through? and b - do I have the correct underwear? If the answer is anything other than no and yes (in that order) please don't take it with you. Thanks.
First of all - Bikinis!
Has there not been enough advice on TV programmes, in magazines, from your friends, even from your mother! Why do people with hugely flabby bellies insist on wearing tiny little bikinis? It looks awful when you are doing anything other than lying down flat and sucking your stomach in so you can;t actually breathe anymore. The worse I happened to see was a woman who must have been 35-40 and a size 12. She had quite a nice figure but clearly hadn't ever done a sit up in her life. She sat round the pool watching her children play and rested her arm on her belly. As in it was rolled up underneath her hiding her bikini bottoms and she had her arm on it squidging it further. Gross!
Denim shorts...
Now I like denim shorts, especially if you have the legs for them. What I am yet to understand is the need for, largely younger girls, to walk around with their shorts undone and bikini bottoms showing. Does anyone actually know the point of this as I think it looks pretty stupid? Maybe those who do it are not very bright and have forgotten how to work a zip. Especially with the sun making everyone's hair blonder and all those brightly coloured cocktails with masses of e numbers. I will assume this is whats happened.
White...
I like white for clothing. Nice linen trousers, long flowing maxi dresses, party dresses and my favourite are a nice pair of white shorts. I did see a lot of underwear on display though. I thought the lingerie business world had thought of all underwear solutions. Unfortunately it appears no one is actually buying them. I don't need to see french knickers of any colour being swallowed by someone's arse whilst I'm enjoying my lamb kleftiko or sipping the aforementioned brightly coloured cocktails. It is not appealing. I suggest checking at home how see through the item of white clothing is and deciding a - is it too see through? and b - do I have the correct underwear? If the answer is anything other than no and yes (in that order) please don't take it with you. Thanks.
Saturday, 11 June 2011
Skunk
Hmmm... someone has dyed their hair. It used to be a nice brown colour that suited her face colourings and style. However she has attempted to go blonde (as she put it on Facebook). Instead what appears to have happened is that she has gone out to get drunk. Found a hair extension stall and bought a gingery blonde clip in. Just the one though. She has then stuck it in randomly towards the back, probably in the hope that she doesn't have to see it. The result I'm afraid to say is a little skunk like. It looks awful! Unfortunately people seem to be commenting in that non committal way they do. 'Oo, I see you've dyed your hair.' This is making her think people like it. I'm sure they don't. Who would?
Monday, 31 January 2011
Work outfits...
Genuinely, why would you wear a matching shell top and trousers?
Grey smart bootcut trousers = ok
Grey shell sleeveless top = bad
Grey smart bootcut trousers and matching shell sleeveless top = horrendously hideous!
How can I drop hints to the person at work wearing such awful outfits? If I don't soon my eyes will burn or I'll laugh in her face.
Also another girl seems to be wearing less clothes everyday. I'm scared she'll turn up wearing a bikini next week. This is not acceptable as we are professionals and she only looks like a professional hooker. It's not ok and I only hope management suggests she wears some trousers with her tops.
Grey smart bootcut trousers = ok
Grey shell sleeveless top = bad
Grey smart bootcut trousers and matching shell sleeveless top = horrendously hideous!
How can I drop hints to the person at work wearing such awful outfits? If I don't soon my eyes will burn or I'll laugh in her face.
Also another girl seems to be wearing less clothes everyday. I'm scared she'll turn up wearing a bikini next week. This is not acceptable as we are professionals and she only looks like a professional hooker. It's not ok and I only hope management suggests she wears some trousers with her tops.
Wednesday, 19 January 2011
The Merits of a Neckerchief
There is a woman at work who, although I don't speak to her often, I find difficult to get on with. You could say our personalities are opposites, or even the only thing we have in common is our job. Then today she decided to wear a red neckerchief...
Now these aren't the most hideous things to grace our fashionable world but it made me wonder... why?
They are too small to provide any warmth and kind of look like they have been shrunk. If she had a cold neck then wear one of the bigger pashmina scarves, they even come in an array of patterns to match outfits and moods. If she was wearing it for decoration then why not a pretty necklace, or a 'statement' necklace. The choices are far more varied than wrapping some old rag around your neck. It almost looked like her husband had tried to gag her (I don't blame him) and it had fallen down!
In conclusion I see no real benefit to these particular items. They're about as useful as the human appendix and largely only appear on Gok Wan makeover shows, where they should stay as far as I'm concerned!!
Now these aren't the most hideous things to grace our fashionable world but it made me wonder... why?
They are too small to provide any warmth and kind of look like they have been shrunk. If she had a cold neck then wear one of the bigger pashmina scarves, they even come in an array of patterns to match outfits and moods. If she was wearing it for decoration then why not a pretty necklace, or a 'statement' necklace. The choices are far more varied than wrapping some old rag around your neck. It almost looked like her husband had tried to gag her (I don't blame him) and it had fallen down!
In conclusion I see no real benefit to these particular items. They're about as useful as the human appendix and largely only appear on Gok Wan makeover shows, where they should stay as far as I'm concerned!!
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